The sheep and the lions

Landing in Conakry at 2:30 in the morning, after a 4 hour flight, felt like landing into many of the airports of the cities of Argentina, where many years ago I used to Tour with a band. We got off the plane through a staircase. Me and a lady a few seats on the back , where the only westerners on the filght. The rest where all africans. Some where dressed in what appeared to be traditional Islamic clothers. Other's wore elegant western suits, some had casual wear and most of the women, wore some very colourfull traditional dressses. We got off the plane throuigh a staircase and headed inside the bus. I was very nervous. For what I heard, Guinea's custom's and immigration are hectic and foreginers are given a very hard time. I was traveling with a lot of recording equipment, many bottles of chinese anti malarial medicine, my laptop, and a lot of small gadgets that where necessary for my journey. Hassle was obvious. My contatct Tom, advised me to allow him to arrange someone, that could pass me through customs. I immediately agreed. Many months before, Tom and I had a meeting, where he described the many aspects of the daily life in Conakry. Overall, he told me that it is almost indispensible to have one or more Africans by your side to get you through things, without being taken advantage of. Someone would be meeting me before the immigration gate with a printed photo of me. The airport was very poorly lit. The interior seemed like a worn out warehouse, with signs that had the letters painted off, and hanging on a single crooked thread. The floor was filthty and everything was lit by a horrible and insufficient fluorescent light.We went through the first gate towards the inside, and some offciers (I guess that's what they where, since they had no uniforms whatsoever) handed out the typical boarding card where you write down all your information incuding reason for travel, place where you would stay, etc...I had 2 very heavy backpacks and my little guitar and was exhausted beyond belief. I kept following the line of people, trying to show an indifferent face, and looking around for my contact. I was so scared. My heart was racing, pumping gallons and galons of blood to my brain that created the most ridicuolous stories I would have to make out to get out of this one.... I headed to a high table and rested my bags and started to complete the paperwork. I looked arounf. Suddenly out of nowhere a big hand grabbed my arm, and said : "This way ... you come here...." A very tall african man, was showing me the way. I didn't know who the heck it was, and at first I thought it was some kind of secret police guy working for the government. Guinea was a dictatorship. The latest head of state, took power in a cou, after lansana Conte, who in turn took power 25 years ago in a cue, passed away.I preteneded I didn't hear him, took his arm away, and ketp filling in the card. I didn't know exactly what to commplete, since I forgot the name of the neighbourhood I was staying. Then, out of nowhere a guy apporaches me and says "JACK !!! how are you " (???????? !!!!! ))I snapped at him in cave man french "me don't know you ! go away !!!". He answered "Jack, you my friend !!! I help you here !! come this way ... " He grabbed my arm, and showed me the way, totally convinced that I was supposed to follow his lead in order to survive. For a mooment, I hesitated, and wondered if Tom, had forgotten to print my picture for my contact. I shily asked "Are you with tom ?" ...he answered "...this way !! this way !!!" Then, the big guy that kept next to me all the time, got into an argument with this other one in a language I didn't understand. It all took a very high tone. We were on the big room before you get into immigration. To even think about a scene like this in any of the western airports would be a very heavy acid surreal nightmare !!!I walked aside, trying to stay out of it, looking all around for my contact that wasn't showing up. I started to follow the line heading towards the immigration officer's booth. Then, I guy salutes me "Alex, I'm your firend." He shows me the picture I sent tom on the email. He smiled to me. He was of a very thin completion and was missing all of his front teeth. I felt relieved. I showed him my docuemtns and told me everything was ok, to follow immigration, that he would meet me in customs. But this relief was short ended. The 2 other guys that where fighting over my flesh, got into an argument with my contact. It gotinto a really high tone, but he kept telling me "just go I'll handle this, just give me US$10 so I can get these 2 idiost off my back !!" . For a moment I though and remembered that Tom told me that everything was paid for. I hesitated but he insisted. I was so scared, and knew he was taking advantage of me, but just gave in and handed him a 20. I had no change. I went through immigration,got my stamp, then handed my yellow fever vaccination record and finally headed to the chamber preceding customs.This was chaos multiplied by ten. I had to pick my bagagge and a dozen other bandits approached me, trying to take my passport and my baggage check tags, so they could do me the "favor" of getting my bags. I saw Tom, and shook his hand. He told me to get my bags quickly that we would still have to go throught customs. I grabbed my bags, ripped off the protective Nylon wrap and mounted them on a cart. Suddenly, the 2 first idiots come near with a soldier, and took away our contact ! I look at Tom with a desperate gaze. He told me with a sign that everything was going to be alright. I saw our contact argue with the officers, then give them a sympathetic pat on the back and slide a few bills in one of their shirt's pockets.He gave us a sign. Tom told me to move quickly next to the custom's table so as to bypass them. A woman dressed in a military uniform was violently placing luggage on some makeshift tables, and opening them for inspection. A bunch of people where all aroung mounting up to a lot of chaos. The whole place was lit by a phantasmagoric fluorescent light hanging hig above. This must be for sure one of the many versions of hell. We swiftly go by, while our contact slides some more bills into another officer's pocket. Yet another one stops us, he looks at the previous one in demand, and he says it's ok. We keep going, and yet another officer standing in the ramp., that takes to the parking lot, sees the size of my luggage and the colour of my skin, and stops us like saying "no no no....now wait a moment....."...Not surprisingly the intital 2 idiots, the tall and the short one, appear out of nowhere like being in cahoots with the officer. Our contact gets into another argument. The officer gets mad, makes a gesture as to put a punch in his face, but get's stopped by te tall idiot. He threatens all mad, with a pointing finger. Our toothless friend, smiles at him, puts his arms around him, slides the magic bills in his pocket and then says something to the 2 idiots.We finally make it to the parking lot where a battered white chevrolet van awaits us. We load my stuff. Our Contqct says "Give me some more money. I need to pay all of these guys that made me go through the doors..." Out of literally nowhere, 8 guys show up including the 2 idiots. Tom hands him a bunch of cash. Toothless, disburses it between all hands, and they all say goodbye.
I was shaking and couldn't believe the mess I got myself into !!!We drove through bumpy , unpaved and dirty roads, covered in garbage. Tom was on the back seat with me explaining all the hassle he had to go through to arrange this. His African Friend was driving. We arrived to a gate, drove through, and entered a candle lit room. Tom told me "This is Djulde's place. He is my friend. He is ok. You will spend the night with him for now." and he left.I arranged all of my stuff in the very small room. I asked about the washroom, he pointed to a door, closed by a curtain. Inside, the was a bowl without a lid, and two buckets with water, no faucet. I washed my face and hands powring water from bucketinto a little cointainer and then my hands.Djulde asked me in rudimentary english If I needed anything, and I said ... "I just want to sleep, thank you very much...." He sais "OK no problem. I am going close door !!!"I layed on a queen size mattress on the floor. Djulde, took one side, I took the other. I felt a little uncomfortable, but then thought "what the heck !!!" As I tried to enter the domain of Morpheus, I felt purple and faint gushes of weirdly formed shapes appear in the background of my very tired eyes. This is going to be strong beyonf belief, I thought....and eventually fainted into wild dreams....